Friday, January 27, 2006. Daily Perks Coffee House

I played a gig last Friday at Daily Perks sharing the stage with Scott Regan and Kinloch Nelson. We basically played round robin style but each of us were encouraged to step in and play on everyone else's songs.

Scott, being the most prolific songwriter while a rudimentary guitar player, tended to lay out while Kinloch or I played. Kinloch, being the most accomplished and advanced guitarist, showcased a couple of pieces that neither Scott nor I got near. I played my usual mixed bag of pieces and Kinloch sometimes joined in and sometimes backed off.

What could have been a trainwreck of different styles and egos actually came off as one of the better nights of music I've been involved in presenting.

We were all pretty encouraged by evening's end and the talk was definitely about doing it again.

the Noble Eightfold Path

In this must-have-quick-access world, I'm posting it here for your and my convenience

WISDOM (SPIRIT)
1. Right View-It begins with the intuitive insight that all beings are subject to suffering and it ends with complete understanding of the true nature of all things

2. Right Intention-the intention of renunciation, which means resistance to the pull of desire-the intention of good will, meaning resistance to feelings of anger and aversion-the intention of harmlessness, meaning not to think or act cruelly, violently, or aggressively, and to develop compassion

ETHICAL CONDUCT (BODY)
3. Right Speech-to abstain from false speech, especially not to tell deliberate lies and not to speak deceitfully-to abstain from slanderous speech and not to use words maliciously against others-to abstain from harsh words that offend or hurt others-to abstain from idle chatter that lacks purpose or depth.
or, positively formulated:-tell the truth-speak friendly, warm, and gently-talk only when necessary

4. Right Action-to abstain from harming sentient beings, especially to abstain from taking life (including suicide) and doing harm intentionally or delinquently-to abstain from taking what is not given, which includes stealing, robbery, fraud, deceitfulness, and dishonesty-to abstain from sexual misconduct.
or, positively formulated:-to act kindly and compassionately-to be honest and to respect the belongings of others-to keep sexual relationships harmless to others
5. Right Livelihood-Right livelihood means that one should earn one's living in a righteous way and that wealth should be gained legally and peacefully

MENTAL DEVELOPMENT (MIND)
6. Right Effort-to prevent the arising of unarisen unwholesome states-to abandon unwholesome states that have already arisen-to arouse wholesome states that have not yet arisen-to maintain and perfect wholesome states already arisen
7. Right Mindfulness-contemplation of the body-contemplation of feeling (repulsive, attractive, or neutral)-contemplation of the state of mind-contemplation of the phenomena
8. Right ConcentrationThe Buddhist method of choice to develop right concentration is through the practice of meditation

Suffering and Wanting

According to the teachings of the Buddha, the principle cause of suffering is the attachment to "desire" or "craving" (tanha). Which is easy enough to consider and accept at a very rudimentary level. But when I begin to examine the most minute wants, it can get overwhelming.

This morning, I wanted to drive my wife's car. Both were covered with snow but hers was parked in front of mine. I would have had to move it in order to drive mine. She is staying home anyway because my son is homebound from his tonsilectomy. On the one hand, it makes perfect sense for me to take her car since she's home all day. On the other hand, what was really at the root of my wanting to take her car? I didn't want to go through the hassel of cleaning off both cars, parking hers on the road, then parking mine on the road, and finally returning hers to the driveway. I didn't want to do that.

So the question becomes: what would a person free from any sense of wanting do?

All the way to work I was pondering whether or not there was enough time for me to get a cup of coffee before my first student. Should I dash over to Canal Town Roasters? Should I just put it off until my first break after noon? I arrived with plenty of time and I walked through the frigid air to the cafeteria and got my coffee. I was aware of the biting cold against my face and I thought "why do I want this cup of coffee so bad?" Doesn't anyone actually need coffee? Many of us talk like we do, mostly joking around, but basically we just want the damn coffee.

What would it be like to go through an entire day without wanting anything?

Perhaps it's the time we waste wondering how to squeeze blood from a stone

There are all these things I'd like to do but I'm only able to do them when I supposedly have "free time". Like practicing. Like writing songs. Like taking care of my nails. You know...like "me" time. Not "Roy time", not "Lisa time", not "family time". Just me. And all the goofy things I like to do that don't necessarily win me any awards, earn me any money, or help humanity in any great way.

So the question is: where do I find this elusive "free time" I've heard so much about. I'd love to know. Maybe you would to. Maybe we could help each other. But then, my God, it would turn into a support group that would have to meet every so often and that would require pouring over our respective schedules and trying to find a block of...free time. It's just not going to work.

Perhaps I could start by examining the time it took me to write this and ponder: Did I just use up some of my valuable personal time? Why didn't I write a song instead of this blog entry? Why didn't I file my nails? Come on, buddy, use your freakin' head! Time is all we got. What's free and what isn't? Perhaps it's simply a state of being.

The First Month of 2006

The first month of the new year. 2006. I don't think any science fiction movies took place in 2006. I've stopped wondering where the flying cars are, where the jet packs are or where the teleporters are. I can only hope that by mid-way through the next century, a future with blue skies, clean air, clean beaches and oceans, and reasonably appropriate ozone levels will prevail.

I'm tired of being cynical and tired of feeling depressed. I'm tired of the left and the right, the complete insanity with which our administration operates. I'm tired of war and terrorism and a manner of dealing with both that seems to only perpetuate the problems.

I'm not an intellectual and I don't pretend that I have answers that I can't get anyone to listen to. I lead a relatively simple life. My work involves providing comfort for the dying. I spend my free time trying to figure out myself and my roll within the big picture. Most of the time my concerns involve preparing dinner, playing with my son, reading him books and getting him down to sleep. All I want is world that allows me, or anyone whose dreams are equally simple, to do just that.

Reliability versus Validity

The best thing about a diet is weighing in, starting the diet, sticking to it for a week and then buying a new scales. I weighed in this Monday morning at 243lbs. All right! I guess while there was a certain reliability factor of the old scales, that mostly gathered dust underneath the bed, I couldn't say they are particularly valid. I kind of knew that going into this. Each time I've weighed in at my doctor's I've been more in the vicinity of 245-250. But then again, who would I be if I didn't play the "hope-against-hope" game? It might have made it easier for me to get this diet going thinking I already weighed considerably less than what I had perceived as my peak weight. Now, psychologically, there's a part of my brain that's saying "Hey, Pal, you just gained 13lbs on your first week of dieting. Good job!"

"Do Or Do Not, There Is No Try" -Yoda

I gave up making New's Years resolutions years ago as it seemed just the very idea doomed any ambition or goal to failure. It seems, however, that my wife and I have actually started, to use the new vernacular, Southbeaching as of yesterday. I weighed in at 230 lbs according to the home scales and my goal is to shed 50 lbs ultimately. If I can get down to 225, I'll consider it a success, though. I think the very fact that this diet is not a New Year's resolution means that I/we've got a shot at success. We'll see and I promise to keep you, dear reader, updated with my progress.

Other New Year's resolutions that I haven't made are to learn html so's I can design my own website and learning a repertoire of the French pop songs I grew up listening to in the 60s. I hope to work on the latter with my father who is a retired French professor. I'm also not resolving to practice guitar, especially classical. I do hope to, though. This old dog needs to learn some new tricks!

Anyway, I'm not resolving to do anything. I guess I either will or I won't do whatever it is I want, need, or hope to do.

What got played a lot over the past year chez moi

In no particular order:

Madeleine Peyroux: Careless Love (09/14/2004)
Keren Ann: Not Going Anywhere (8/24/2004)
John Scofield: That's What I Say (6/7/2005)
Jimmie Dale Gillmore: Come on Back (8/16/2005)
Fairfield Four: I Couldn't Hear Nobody Pray (9/09/1997)
Lucinda Williams: World Without Tears (4/08/03)
Giovanni De Chiaro: Scott Joplin on Guitar (7/17/1991)
Fionna Apple: Extraordinary Machine (10/04/2005)
Rakesh Chaurasia: Sunrise to Moonlight (2000)
Jessie Mae Hemphill: Feelin' Good (7/22/1997) and She-Wolf (1/13/1998)